


you're one of the few things that I'm sure of

by Skamtrash



Category: SKAM (Norway)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Stripper/Exotic Dancer, Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bad Boy Even, Blow Jobs, Christmas, Deepthroating, Flirting, Jealousy, Kissing, Loner, M/M, Meeting the Parents, Prison, Secrets, Size Difference, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-02
Updated: 2019-10-20
Packaged: 2020-11-15 12:30:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 17,617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20866265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skamtrash/pseuds/Skamtrash
Summary: Isak has created a good life for himself. Sure, his job isn't ideal and university is stressful but hes created this life on his own. He enjoys the luxury of solitude and feeling safe.In comes Even, a felon with, baggage who knows exactly what he wants.





	1. Chapter 1

Love was never in the cards for Isak, at least that's what he convinced himself all his life. When his parents divorced when he was 13, he knew that love and marriage and commitment were a falsity and if his parents couldn't stick together, what was the point. What did he have to aspire to and when everyone in high school started to get into relationships and hook up, Isak found himself being left behind. There's also the simple possibility that Isak never put himself out there like his classmates, he never went to parties which is where most of the hook ups occurred or really bothered to show interest in anyone but most of high school was stuck with him figuring out if he even wanted to hook up, if girls were even a thing he was into. Upon realizing, he wasn't, he felt even more distant and left behind from his peers. The isolation pushed Isak to be a bit of a recluse, he had to learn to love spending time with himself and that's what he did and this has been his life for the last several years.

Isak was currently in university in his second year and he really loved it. Besides always having to break night, the intense workload and sacrificing his morals to make quick money to afford an apartment to live close to campus as well as his future as a medical student, he enjoyed everything that university had to offer. He especially being able to blend in the crowds, attend class everyday without the pressure to make friends because everyone was in and out, no need to socialize and lollygaggle. He felt at home in the solace.

Which is why meeting and falling for Even was completely unexpected. Isak had a routine, go to school, go to work, go home. His routine was his safety net and it was rare that he allowed himself moments to do much else, to cut out time for things he enjoyed like sitting in a nice cafe to read or painting. But those moments were rare, once in a blue moon he he allowed himself to stray away from the familiarity of his schedule. 

He first met Even while he was at work. He was on the bar, dancing to the beat of the music on the pole. It wasn't ideal but he knew he was rather fit and this job worked for him. It was quick and easy, not much energy being exerted, out in several hours to make 10x more than he would as a bartender or barista. He's swaying his hips, collecting tips along the way from hungry eyes eager to touch him which thankfully they weren't allowed to do in this establishment. His eyes gaze to the back of the club and he sees a particularly tall guy dressed in all black smoking, as he watches him, his gaze unwavering. Isak is a little confused, he doesn't look interested or even horny, he can't really decipher what the look is. He just wants to know if he's going to give a tip or not and if it's worth making his way over to him. He dances a bit more, collecting tips from the guys surrounding him and after several minutes, he looks back over and the guy is still staring at him. Isak makes a flirtatious_ come here_ motion and the guy shakes his head, giving Isak the same motion. 

Isak sits down on the bar counter, hopping off and walking over to the blond. He smiles up at him and starts swaying his hips, his persona in full force, "Hi."

When the guy doesn't respond, instead shamelessly checking Isak out, he says, "You couldn't stop looking at me."

The guy nods and wraps his arms around Isak's waist but Isak takes a hold of his hands, placing them back down by the guy's side, "You're new here?"

The guy takes a hit of what Isak recognizes as a joint and ask, "That obvious?" And fuck, his voice sent tingles through Isak's petite body.

"You touched me." He points out. "You're not allowed to here. Regulars know that."

"When are you done with this?" He ask, clearly not wanting to harbor on the previous topic.

"Hmm?" 

"The dancing, when do you finish?" 

Isak flinches and gives an awkward chuckle, his dance moves coming to a halt, "I'm not a prostitute or anything." 

"Did I say that?" He ask with an interrogative tone.

"Why do you want to know when I'm done?"

"I want to see you. Outside of here."

Isak chuckles in disbelief, "But I dont even know you."

"I'm Even." He shares simply.

"Even, that's sweet but I'm--this." He says gesturing down to how he looks right now and this whole situation he's in "This isnt me, okay? I know you're probably attracted to the fact that I do this and that's why you want to see me but its just for the money. I'm not--I have a separate life outside of this and this isn't something I really want to be doing. Sorry to disappoint " 

He watches Even ruffle through his pocket and pull out his wallet, he gives him the several cash bills he has and stuffs it in his shorts, "This money is for the dancing by the way, not anything else." And with that, Even turns on his heels and is out the door. Isak stares at the wall blankly and looks around him, wondering if anyone else caught that odd interaction. He returns to dancing and a little over an hour later, he is pocketing his cash and getting dressed properly to home. He throws his beanie over his curls and puts on his creme, oversized sweater, cuffing up the long sleeves. He puts his black jeans and sneakers back on and gathers his duffle and heads out about thirty minutes after customers have left and heads home to eat some leftovers and head to bed.

.

He starts seeing Even every time he's at work. He wonders if the man comes everyday hoping Isak works or he happens to know some inside scoop on whenever he has a shift. Isak doesn't mind it, Even tips often enough. It's been two weeks and Even had quickly become a regular, even stepping it up to sitting at the bar after his fourth visit. Isak's dancing to a new pop song he hasn't heard of yet on the bar. He's kneeling on the bar swaying, at eye level with some of the men, eye contact always helps with the tips. He collects the money being handed out and closes his eyes, get lost in the moment when he suddenly feels a hand slap his ass. His eyes widen in shock as he turns around to find the culprit and he doesn't need to narrow it down because as he looks behind him, Even has the man's fingers bent backwards, "Touch him again and I'll break your fingers." He spits through his teeth, in the most intimidating tone Isak's ever heard. He's almost a little terrified himself. He watches the creepy man head to a separate part of the bar, clearly intimidated but but not enough to leave. 

Isak gives him a quick smile, completely enamored by the mystery before continuing his dance until the end of his shift. When he's wrapping up two hours till midnight, he doesn't wait for all the customers to leave before he heads out. He gets dressed quickly and scurries out the front, trying to find Even. When he spots him, walking up to a car, he walks quickly over to him and tugs on his hand. He turns around, looking down at Isak without a word.

"I just--I guess I wanted to thank you for earlier. For making sure that guy didn't touch me again."

"You're welcome." He says simply, turning around to head into the car before turning back to face Isak, "You don't deserve to be treated like that. You don't even deserve to be in there." He says sounding frustrated. "You're too good for that."

"You dont have to demean it, it's not terrible. But thank you."

"Are you hungry or something? Can I take you to get something to eat?"

Isak stares up at him curiously and finds himself drawn to him and he doesn't know why. He gives a short nod as Even hops in the drivers seat after unlocking the door and he takes that as his cue to go to the passenger seat. Even drives to a nearby diner that Isak has walked by a million times but never visited. There's only one other person in the restaurant so Isak and Even choose a booth, and sift through the menu. 

Or rather Isak does because Even has not picked it up. Isak looks above his menu and sees Even resting his head on his hand, staring at Isak and the boy blushes, "Can you stop looking at me like that?"

"Sorry, I just--fuck, you're beautiful. And in that sweater..." Even says in awe. Isak is wearing his usual, an oversized sweater and jeans and a beanie but it seems to be doing things to Even which Isak thinks is quite funny since the man has practically seen him naked. 

"Thank you." He shyly replies as he looks back down at his menu, taking his hat off so his curls fall in front of his face, hiding his embarrassment. "Do you know what you're getting?" He ask afters several moments, placing the menu down.

"I'm not hungry."

"What?" He ask confused. "Why are we here then? I don't want to eat by myself."

"If you're hungry, order something. I dont mind."

"So you're just going to sit there and watch me eat?" He questions.

"I've sat back and watched you dance for the past couple weeks. You should be used to this by now." Isak shakes his head with a smirk and looks up at the waitress as she approaches. He orders waffles and hands her back both their menus. The menus served as a buffer and now Isak feels quite awkward. He brings his knees up to his chest and brings his sweater covered hand up to his mouth as he looks over at Even who is still completely shameless about staring, "Dont you have to work tomorrow or something?" Isak finds himself asking.

"I dont work." He shares.

"Oh, are you still in university or something?" He ask. Even shakes his head and Isak's brows furrow, "Okay then what do you do all day?"

Even shrugs, "I chill. I hang out, watch a movie, come see you."

Isak is staring at him in disbelief completely confused but simultaneously enamored, "Why are you so mysterious?"

"Am I?" He asked sipping on the beer he ordered.

"A little bit." He banters slightly sarcastic.

"Well Isak, when you've been through what I been through, you tend to be a little guarded and mysterious." He says.

"And what have you been through?"

"Well, wouldn't be a mystery, would it?" He questions.

.

When Isak is working several days later, he's rather in a bad mood. He has to work a little later than he thought, he still has homework he didn't finish since he thought he would be out at a good time and everything about the day just seemed off which is why his performance just wasn't as enthusiastic as usual but he tried his best to turn it up and hopefully this night can balance out if he made a little more than his usual. 

Meanwhile, Even is tucked somewhere unnoticeable by Isak with his friend, Niko. As they're sipping on his drink, Evens gaze and attention only hones in on Isak.

"Is that the guy you were telling me about? That you're into?"

Even nods, chugging the rest of his beer.

"He's hot." Niko says checking him out and Even whips his head over to him with a death glare and Niko chuckles, "Relax. He's objectively hot and he's a good dancer."

"I know but he's done even better before." Even says leaning up off the wall and walking a little closer, waiting for Isak to spot him. It takes a couple minutes but he freezes for a brief moment when he sees him and keeps dancing. Even gives him a come here motion. He dances for a couple more beats before climbing off the bar, taking tips as he got down. He walks over to Even, dancing in front of him since that's really the only interaction he's allowed to have with customers. 

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing." Isak insists looking down, continuing to step to the beat.

"Isak" He says with a harsh tone picking Isaks head up by his chin so he's looking at him. Isak glances at security who are looking at another dancer and he looks back at Even, "Be careful, if they see you touch me, they'll--"

"I don't give a shit, they're not going to touch me. What's wrong? I can tell something is wrong." 

"I'm fine. I just have a lot of work to do when I finish but I'm okay." Isak smiles, giving a quick squeeze to his hand before walking away. 

"Let me take you home." Even calls out to Isak as he's climbing back up the bar and Isak nods and mouths midnight as he gets back into the zone. 

Even walks back over to Niko, who's smoking a joint. Even snatches it out of his hand and takes a puff himself.

"What happened?"

"Nothing." Even says tilting his head back and letting the smoke escape through his nose, "I'm taking him home later, he's just stressed from school."

"Are you guys going to fuck? It's been weeks, man since you first told me about him."

"He's not like that." He answers tilting his head back down, eyes focused back on Isak who's teasing a guy in front of him. He watches the blond run his hands through his curls and get on his knees, crawling closer to the guy who looks so disgustingly hungry. Even shakes his head disgusted, "Look how they're fucking look at him, god it's so--" He seethes. 

Niko let's Even rant to him but he continues smoking his joint, getting high into oblivion. 

When the night is wrapping up, Even tells Niko he should head out while he waits for Isak. It's a little chillier out so he waits outside the bar in his car. When he spots him heading out, he rolls down the window and honks his horn and Isak makes his way over. 

He walks around the car to get in the passenger seat and buckles his seatbelt. 

"Thanks for waiting."

"You know I'm always waiting for you." He says resting back in the seat as he drives off, "Where am I going?"

"Just go straight and turn left when we get to 159. Where did your friend go?" 

Even watches as Isak brings his legs up to his chest and he feels small heart palpitations in being rereminded of how small he is. God, it does things to Even.

"He left a little before you came out."

"Oh okay."

After a few moments, Even says, "I hated the way those men were looking at you tonight."

Isak looks over to Even and tugs his beanie further on his head, "Why?"

"They're fucking gross. Just drooling over you, popping boners, just wanting to fuck you."

"And you dont?" Isak inquires with raised eyebrows in question, already knowing that was the case. Even made it obvious that he was into him.

When Even doesn't reply, Isak turns to look out at the window and mutters, "I'll take that as a yes."

"I'm not just ---Im worth more than that. I know I put myself in this situation but I can be more than just someone to get off with." He murmurs, still looking out into the streets. He's never told anyone or really had anyone to tell that it does quite bother him that people only assume he's good for sex and nothing else. Only sexualizing him when really thats the last word he would use to identify himself. He in fact likes the opposite, feeling innocent and safe.

"I know you're worth more than that." Even says making a left when they've reached 159. "I've told you that."

"So you don't want to--you know, have sex with me?"

"I didn't say that. I mean, I'm not blind, Isak. You're fucking--you don't know the things you do to me or the things I want to do to you but I know there's more to you than that. If I _just_ wanted to fuck you, I wouldn't still be here almost a month later."

"It's on the next block on the left." Isak instructs as Even puts on his blinkers to double park when he pulls up to his building.

"So what is it that you want from me?" Isak ask hesitantly. 

"To get to know you, to hang out. That's it." Even says looking over at him.

"Well, I still don't even know you. I don't know anything but your name. I don't know what you do during your days or about your family or your hobbies. All I know is that you're into me and have a lot of secrets. So how are you trying to know me when you don't open up yourself?"

"What do you want to know?" Even ask.

Isak looks at him curiously, accessing if he's actually going to answer his questions, "Well, how do you get the money to tip me if you don't work?"

"Savings." He says simply. "And my parents help a bit"

"Why don't you get a job?" He ask.

"No one's going to hire me." He says simply. 

"Well why not? I'm sure if you volunteer to get some experience then--"

"Isak." He interrupts. "Its not that simple. I've been incarcerated." He says looking away from him. "So a job is just not happening for me."

"Incarcerated?" He questions, his eyes riddled with shocked. "For what?"

"I don't want to talk about it." He says suddenly, guard back up

"Even, what did--"

"I'm done talking about it." He says. 

Isak stares at him in shock, trying to imagine what he could of done to have ended up behind bars. For all he knows, he's in the car with a criminal.

"I'm not dangerous, Isak. I didn't do anything like that." Even says as if reading his mind. 

"I'm going to go" He says uneasily opening up the door, "Please don't come see me anymore." 

Isak closes the door and walks around the car to head to his building. Even rolls the window down, "Isak, I didn't do anything like that. I didn't hurt anyone."

Isak looks back at him, not knowing what to believe and just heads into his apartment building, hesitant of the fact that he let Even drive him home and the man now knows where he lives. 

.


	2. Chapter 2

Isak has a week break approaching and is looking forward to finally having some time off to relax. He plans on going to his favorite cafe and possibly going pumpkin picking since it's autumn and he wants some for his apartment. When he's not completely stressed and overwhelmed, he can thoroughly enjoy his days. 

When he gets back from the pumpkin picking and drops his findings at home, he heads out to the cafe several streets down. He orders his hot cider and plays an audio book through his headphones as he curls into the love seat. 

.

Even wasn't trying to look for him, sure he missed seeing him all the time but when he walks into the cafe, he's taken aback when he sees Isak, who has not yet noticed him. He's in a rustic orange sweater with fitted gray sweatpants and a black jacket on top. His curls are out, free of his usual beanie and Even had really missed seeing him. 

He orders a drink and walks over to Isak, casting a shadow. Isak looks up and he sighs upon realizing it's Even. He looks back down at his phone and Even takes that chance to sit on the arm of the seat 

"Even, Im busy" He mumbles dismissively 

"You just going to ignore me forever?" He ask monotone.

"I don't want to be friends with a criminal." He says looking up at him

Even sighs and shakes his head and leans down so no passerby overheard, "I sold drugs, okay? That's all I did. I didn't hurt anyone or whatever you're imagining."

"You're a drug dealer." Isak accesses. 

"Was. Not anymore."

"Why?" Isak ask.

"I don't want--" Isak looks back at his phone, not wanting to hear how he has more secrets to keep but he quickly feels Evens hand come to his chin to tilt his head up to look at him and he whimpers quietly, "I don't want to talk about it here" Even says. "Lets go outside" 

Isak finds himself helplessly walking after Even. They stand outside the cafe, leaning back against the glass. He watches Even pull a small silver container from his pocket and pulls out a joint to smoke. After his first hit, he says, "I got involved in the wrong crowd. The friends I had at the time were doing it so I started and I was really good. But then I realized I could make more money if I sold stuff my friends weren't selling and so I started selling harder drugs. One day, I got caught at a friend's house. The police came because music was too loud and saw we had some stuff, they searched us and when they found that stuff on me, that was it." He shrugs as he looks out into the streets, joint between his lips 

Isak doesn't even know how to respond. This is so out of his element and foreign. "Even, I try really hard to create a good life for myself. And the way it is now, I like it for the most part and--"

"And you want nothing to do with a felon." He finishes as if not surprised. "Just like the rest of the world." 

Isak takes his free hand and sighs, "That's not what I mean. I had a bad time growing up, okay? My house was very unstable and when I finally got to be on my own, I felt safe, you know? For the first time in a long time and you-- I know sometimes people can still want their money or recognize you or something, I don't know but my safety is a priority."

"You think I wouldn't keep you safe?" He ask genuinely looking down at him for the first time since they came out here. "I'm not involved in that Isak, it's been years. No one is coming for me. I did my time and I'm done now. You're safe, I promise."

Isak bites on inner cheek nervously and just shrugs helplessly, "What do you want me to do, Even?"

"I want you to go on a date with me."

Isak chuckles disbelievingly at the juxtaposition of his life, just returned from the pumpkin patch and is now about to potentially have a date with a former drug dealer and a felon. But for some reason, despite Evens past, he still finds himself completely enamored and intrigued more than he's willing to admit so he says, "Okay, when?"

"Now" He says and starts walking, "Follow me." And so Isak does.

About 30 minutes later, they're pulling up at a viewpoint overlooking the city. Even picked up food on their way here so he digs in, lying the food atop his center console. 

Isak doesn't have a big appetite so he picks at the fries and draws his knees into himself. 

"I love it when you do that." Even says staring at him with an admirable gaze and Isak looks up wide eyed, the fry halfway to his mouth, "Do what?"

"That." He says pointing to his legs, "You're so small, it's cute"

"You like that I'm so much smaller than you? " He ask confused. Even nods as he eats his sandwich. Sometimes, Isak gets a little taken aback at how forward Even is.

"Do you work tonight?" Even ask.

Isak shakes his head, "Tomorrow. So do you want to play a game?"

"I don't really do games" Even says dismissively.

"You said you wanted to get to know me"

"Okay, what is it?" 

"We can just do like a 21 questions, get to know each other a little better." And so they play and finally Isak thinks, he's finally getting to know Even. He learns that hes really close with his parents, he learns that Even had dreams of being a filmmaker before things took a turn in his life, he learns that Even is pansexual. That he's never been in a relationship. That he wants to travel. That he really wants to keep seeing Isak. 

Isak tells Even about his childhood. About how he found his job. About what he's hoping for his future and his career. About living in solace for so long. About needing honesty around him. About wanting to see Even some more too. 

.

A couple days later as Isak is getting ready for work, he gets a text

_do you work tonight? _

_yeah, getting ready now_

_can I drive you? I'm in the neighborhood_

_okay, I'll be down in 15_

When Isak is ready to go, he heads downstairs and hops into Even's car, "Hi" He smiles throwing his bag on the floor.

"Hey, what's up?" He ask driving off.

"Nothing, thanks for driving me."

"How was class?" He ask.

Isak groans and rants about his frustrating day and Even listens attentively. When they arrive at the bar, Isak ask, "Are you coming in?"

"I don't know. Now that we're sort of somewhat seeing each other, I don't know if I could stand to watch those men look at you"

Isak giggles flattered, "Okay, well if you come in, I'd like that"

"Yeah?" Even ask smoothly.

Isak licks his lips, confirming with a nod. Even leans over and gives Isak the softest, chaste most teasing kiss before saying, "I'll see you in a bit"

Isak smiles before taking his bag, heading inside as he says hello to the bouncer. 

.

It took Even time to decide if he was going to see Isak tonight at work. He had nothing better to do but he also didn't know if he'll be able to tame his frustration of the looks and attempted touches they'd give Isak, he wasn't sure if he could handle it. But he found himself walking inside anyway about an hour later.

He stayed in the back, going unnoticed, letting Isak do his thing. Isak was dressed in black latex shorts and a fitted black latex top showing off his midriff. 

He's working the pole, spinning, flipping upside down, earning every dollar being thrown in his direction. Even is sure to only watch Isak and not the creepy men below him but he hears one of the men whistle at Isak and his gaze shifts like a hawk, trying to narrow in on who did it. 

His eyes waver trying to decipher who when he watches an older man holding out a lot of money, trying to wave Isak over, enticing him. He watches as Isak gets off the pole and dances across the bar over to the man, reaching out for the bills.

The guy says something to Isak and he watches the blond shake his head and he watches the guy get closer, whisper in his ear and watches Isak blush and shake his head again, taking the money. 

Even looks down in his hand and finds his can of beer crushed. He accidently bites the tip of his tongue in anger and takes some napkins, wiping off the beer that spilled on his hand. He looks back up at the show and something rises within him, he's not sure what as he watches Isak giving the same man a lap dance. Anger surges controllably throughout his body. He storms over and Isak makes eye contact with Even before he even makes it to him. When Even reaches him, he waits for an explanation and doesn't get one, "I thought no one could touch you."

"Relax" Isak says grinding in the guys lap as he looks up at Even 

"Wait your turn, man" The guy groans clearly annoyed that Isak was getting distracted. 

"Fuck off!!" Even curses trying to keep his fist at his side. 

"Relax" Isak says calmly. "I'll explain later. Just go get a drink." Even sighs and walks away. This is Isaks work, he knows this is what he does but a lap dance? That was against the rules and was too intimate anyway but here he is with another beer clenched in his hand, scrolling his phone to keep himself distracted. He only watches Isak the last half hour or so before he takes his last tips and heads to the back. Even goes outside for a smoke while he waits. About 10 minutes later, Isak is trailing outside in his puffy coat. They walk in silence to the car and Even turns the heat on when they get in. 

"So.." Even starts. "What did that guy whisper to you?" Even ask cutting to the chase. 

"He wanted me to go home with him. I obviously said no but he had a lot of money in his hand so I gave him a lap dance. I can do that if it's on my terms. Also still doesn't mean they can touch me or feel me up, it's still just dancing."

Even nods, rolling down the window, blowing out the smoke from the joint he was still smoking.

"Even, you can't be jealous, I mean, I know it's hard but this is still my job. I know what I'm doing but if you know coming here makes you upset, then you don't have to come. I think we are seeing each other enough out of here to fulfill you"

Even can't help but smile at how adorable Isak was being, "Should we go eat?"

"I made food last night...if you want to come over?"

They share an undeciphered longing look before Even is accepting the offer.

When they get to Isaks apartment, Even is taken aback by how clean it is. Everything in its rightful place. Isak clearly has a thing for plants and neutrals since that's pretty much his entire apartment.

"I have lasagna, is that okay?" He hears Isak call from the kitchen. "Yeah" Even says joining him in there as the shorter blond takes the tray out the fridge and places it back in the oven to reheat. 

"I'm going to change really quick. You can turn the tv on." He says scurrying to his room. Even is lounging on the couch when Isak comes out several minutes later and Even is instantly hypnotized seeing Isak with merely an oversized shirt that falls halfway down his small thighs. Isak is about to head to the kitchen but Even calls his name, telling him to come here.

Even takes Isaks hand and pulls the boy to sit on his lap, his legs separating on either side of Even, Isak keeps the front of his shirt tugged down.

"Why are you wearing this?

"What do you mean? I sleep in this"

Even places his right hand on Isaks upper thigh and uses the other to pull him in for a kiss. Isak whines caught off guard but kisses Even back, "You're so gorgeous, Isak" He mumbles, squeezing his thigh

Isak smiles in the kiss, wrapping his arms around Evens neck. They make out for the first time sweet and eager until Isak reluctantly pulls back, his forehead still pressed against Evens, "I need to get the food." He says not particularly wanting to pull away before getting off the couch to turn off the oven and pull the tray out with the oven mitts, cooling it off. He cuts each of them a hefty piece before walking back to the couch. They eat their food while watching TV. About a half hour later, Isak sadly tells Even he should head out, since he needs to go to bed. They kiss once more before saying their goodbye for the night. 

.

The two start frequently seeing each other outside of Isaks work and when the younger of the duo wasn't busy. Isak has just risen from his 9 hour slumber and is making breakfast before he heads out to class. He takes his time eating, showering, getting dressed before finally leaving his apartment and checking his phone for the first that morning at 9:15 and sees a text from Even. 

He feels himself cracking a smile without having read the messages yet. Being around Even, speaking with him or even thinking about him made Isak happy. They got on so well and things were quite nice and his smile only brightens when he reads the message that was sent over an hour ago.

_good morning. had a dream about you last night. I really want to see you, I can't stop thinking about you. let me know when you're free? have a good day at class._

_hey:) thanks for the sweet message. I get out of class around noon, we can get lunch?_

_okay, I'll meet you at your school!_

_okay. al_ _so why were you up so early?_

_I told you I had a dream about you, it was so nice, it woke me up_

_was it a sweet dream or r rated?_

_a bit of both?_

_are you going to tell me what happened?_

_do you want to know that bad?_

_I'm curious_

_well, we were just like hanging out, watching a movie, being cute together as we are and spent the day together inside at your place just messing around. and I guess later on, we did stuff_

_how anti climatic _

_did you want the whole novel? lol and you're on your way to school, no? _

_I'm on the tram, I'm just curious, even._

_it involved your mouth on me and me being a little reckless..._

_oh.._

_yep, that was the dream._

_interesting, lots to think about _

_??_

_lol I'm kidding, just thought it would be funny. _

_you're cute_

_:)) so I'll see you later?_

_yeah_

.

Even was waiting for Isak outside of his class, sitting on the bench not far from the entrance. He should be out any minute if his professor didn't keep the class overtime like they seemed to be doing lately.

He sees him walking out of the building, talking to a girl he presumes is his classmate. He watches Isak's gaze shift trying to find him and smiles when he does. He watches the two say their goodbyes as Isak walks over to him Even stands up meeting him halfway, "Hi" Isak greets with a smile once they're in front of each other

"How was class?" Even ask.

"It was fine, we have an exam on Friday." He groans. "I just want to graduate already, I'm sick of taking tests." He admits resting his head in Even's chest. 

"You'll be fine, Isak. I know it. All you do is study." Isak pouts and tilts his head up to look up at Even, "Where are we going to eat?"

"Was thinking we can try the new spot that opened near here." 

Isak agrees and they leave campus, leaving Evens car parked and walk to the nearby restaurant. The two sit at the bar instead of the booth, preferring to be beside each other. They talk and banter for several hours before Isak is telling Even they should head home so he can get started on his assignments. They walk the short walk to campus to get in Evens car and he drives to Isaks place.

"Can I come up with you?" Even ask

"You don't have any friends?" He teases though he's no better. 

"Tends to happen when you come out of prison" He shares honestly. 

"Jeez, I was kidding but seriously, I do have work to do."

"I won't distract you."

Isak narrows his gaze, highly doubting that but Even swears so Isak shrugs and they head up to his apartment. They kick their shoes off at the door and as usual, Isak gets changed when he comes home and as usual, it's in something that completely makes Even weak in the knees. It's a cropped shirt and some baggy sweats. When Isak comes to the living room to sit beside him with his laptop, Even groans falling back onto the couch. Isak chuckles, used to this reaction now and it happened no matter what Isak wore. 

"So much for me not distracting you, you're doing all the distracting." Even says still leaned back as Isak is opening up his browser. He pulls his planner out of his bag, scanning through his assignments when he starts feeling kisses on his lower back. 

"Even.." He chuckles. "I need to focus"

"Me too" Even mumbles, kissing up his back. Isak fondly rolls his eyes and just let's Even ravish his back as he pleases. He feels him up near his neck, kisses wrapping around to the front of his neck and Even lifts his head up for a real kiss for the first time today. Isak smiles at all the effort Even just went through for this kiss. But true to his word, Even does pull back and chill and let's Isak work. He's on his phone for a bit, he eats some of Isaks snacks, he checks out his room for the first time, finding it completely cozy and comfortable. 

He looks at the gigantic mirror above his dresser and the photos that decorate it. There's scenic photos, a photo of a puppy Even assumes was Isaks childhood pet that passed. The only photo with Isak in it is with another guy, curly hair, thick brows and the photo is from ages ago because Isak looks practically prepubescent. He walks back into the living room and simply watches Isak work. He's sat on the floor cross legged, his back against the couch, laptop on the table with papers spread out as he types something up, "Take a break" Even says

Isak doesn't even glance up so Even repeats himself and Isak looks at him, it finally dawning what Even says and he shakes his head, "I can't"

Even walks over to Isak, "You need a break, just 10 minutes. You can't sustain this for the rest of schooling, Isak. Please take a break, these assignments can wait 10 minutes. Let's just lay down and rest."

Isak sighs and nods because he knows Even is right. He climbs onto the couch and Even joins him as their bodies interlock with one another's. 

"Aren't you bored...of watching me work?"

"What else should I do?" Even ask.

Isak shrugs, "Just don't want you always waiting around for me. Have you thought about volunteering or anything? Like at a community center or a school, something."

Even sighs, "Isak, I tried with jobs. I went to over 20 interviews when I got out and as soon as they check I'm a felon, they want nothing to do with me."

"But this is different. They're not going to background check for volunteering."

"Can we just talk about something else please? Like the guy on your mirror you have a photo with"

"I'm not letting this go, Even." He insists before looking down and playing with the metal rings on Evens fingers, That was my best friend. Jonas"

"What happened? I guess nothing bad since his picture is up there."

"Erm--well yeah, nothing really, I think we just grew apart throughout high school. We were into different things and when we went to different universities, we just stopped talking."

Even nods in understanding, "Why is his picture there?"

"Just miss him, I guess."

Evens brings his hand up to Isaks hair, gently running his fingers through them, "Have you thought about reaching out? "

Isak shakes his head and inches his hand up Even's shirt to wrap around his waist, bringing him closer, "I feel like he probably moved on in life, you know ? And I dont think he even goes to school in Norway anymore."

"Well that doesn't mean he's never coming back, I'm sure he comes home for breaks. If you really miss him, you should just tell him. See if he would want to catch up when he's back. Do you still have his number?"

"Of course" He says looking up at Even. He'll never delete Jonas' number even if they did end things badly. In fact, he has it memorized so there's no way he would ever forget. 

"We should text him." Even suggests lightly. 

"Really? And say what?"

"I don't know, maybe just like hey, I know it's been a while but whenever you're back in town, we should hang out"

"What if he says no?"

Even shrugs, "Then at least you know."

Isak nods and gives Even his phone, "You can do it"

Even shakes his head, "I think you should." Isak reluctantly takes back his phone and finds Jonas' contact.

The cursor hovers intimidating him but he starts typing,

_hey jonas, its isak. I know it's been a while but wanted to text and see how you've been? maybe we can catch up whenever you have time_

Isak let's out the breath he's been holding and tucks his phone away.

"How do you feel?" Even ask.

"I'm nervous, I don't know what he's going to say. What if he's a different person and he's mean now and wants nothing to do with me?" 

"Isak" Even chuckles. "You have nothing to worry about. You're overthinking."

Isak is about to reply when he feels the vibration in his pocket. He freezes and pulls out his phone, "You look first" He says pushing his phone against Evens chest.

Even picks the unlocked phone up and reads the message,

_wow, hey isak. It has been a while. I've been pretty good, just university still. I'm actually in uni in France but I come back in a couple weeks and we can chill then and catch up? I miss you bro_

He shows Isak the message who starts smiling and biting his inner cheek and looks up at Even, "He misses me."

"I told you there was nothing to worry about." Even smiles kissing his forehead. Isak text back,

_I miss you too. Yeah, just text me when you're back and we'll chill_

_._

Jonas text Isak about three weeks later when he's coming back to Oslo for a long weekend. Isak was nervous, truth be told. He just didn't know if things would get awkward because it's been so long and they've known each other since they were 5.

They were set to meet at their favorite kebab place. Isak stood inside, staring out the glass door patiently but anxiously. He was bundled up in his creme fuzzy coat and creme hat to keep cozy in the brisk weather. And suddenly he sees him. Jonas crossing the street towards the spot, looking exactly the same except most of his curls were cut off.

When Jonas spots him through the glass, Isak gives a shy wave and Jonas smiles, heading in and enveloping him in a tight hug, "God Isak, I'm sorry it's been so long" He says still in his arms.

When the pull back, Isak shrugs, "it happens. I like your hair"

"Thanks" Jonas smiles ruffling his own hair, "My mom was ready for me to cut it." They sit on the stools right beside them at the window and Jonas ask, "So what's up? Update me on everything. I was surprised you messaged me to be honest."

"Yeah um--Im kind of seeing someone right now and I have this photo of us in my place and he saw it and asked me about you and encouraged me to reach out."

Jonas slowly nods, "You're gay?"

Isak eyes widen realizing that one, he and Jonas had grew apart before he embraced his sexuality so he never told him and two, the fact that he so casually said _he_ without realizing.

"Um--yeah, I am." He answers. 

"Cool, dude that's cool. Also, you have a photo of us in your place? That's nice, you're making me feel quite shit" He chuckles. "I'm sorry by the way about like how things happened and I know it's normal for people to grow apart but we were brothers, dude. So I'm sorry if it's something I did."

"It wasn't you. It's just we started getting into different stuff. You liked going out and I really hated that" he admitted. "It made me quite anxious and also being in the closet and being around your friends just trying to hook up with girls wasn't fun for me. So it's not your fault, it just happens."

"Yeah but I feel like I didn't try much either. Why didn't you tell me back then...that you were gay?"

Isak shrugs, "I don't know, I was still coming to terms with it in high school and once i finally accepted it, we weren't that close anymore." 

"Well I'm glad you reached out, bro. Seriously so we can be close again"

Isak smiles and nods in agreement, "So what's been going on?"

"Nothing really, I'm at university in France doing mechanical engineering. I have a girlfriend, we've been together for almost a year. I'm working, going out, just having fun. I love it in France. What's been going on? Who's the boyfriend?"

Isak blushes, "We're not officially boyfriends or anything but his name is Even and he's super sweet to me. He met at my work and yeah, we've just been hanging out the last couple of months. But other than that, I'm still in school, working, trying to stay afloat."

"I'm happy you're doing well. Let me see a picture of him"

"I don't have one"

"Fine, I'll just Facebook him when I get home. Whats his full name? And how are your parents?"

And so Jonas and Isak spend hours catching up on many years lost and Isak returns back home with a full heart until the next morning, when he's waking up to a text from Jonas, 

_hey bro, I tried looking your bf up, couldn't find him on fb so I googled and saw this? Is this him? _

and attached is a photo of Evens mugshot. Isak swallows the lump in his throat and is fully awake now.

He knows Even is a good person but it doesn't make Isak feel better to admit that yes, that is his Even in the photos and that's Jonas' first impression

He reluctantly types out

_yes_

_but he's done with all of that stuff _

Jonas text back about 10 minutes later,

_oh, okay..._

_I know it's kind of weird but he's a nice person so I'd appreciate if you didn't judge him because of his past_

_under normal circumstances, I wouldn't but I don't know, I mean sexual assault isn't meant to be taken lightly_

Isak brows furrow in confusion as he types out _What? _

_the charge? that's what it was for???_

_no, it was for drugs_

_oh, this page doesn't say that _and there's an attached photo of a screenshot with the page with Even's mugshot and the charge and there it is. Isak feels like bile might rise from his throat, that can't be right. He's absolutely fuming as he gets out of bed and starts pacing the entirety of his apartment as he calls up Even. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let me know your thoughts and what you think is going to happen


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: mention of rape.
> 
> This is quite long but hope you enjoy nonetheless. Let's have suspension of disbelief for anything relates to legal issues, k thx. Thanks so much for taking the time to read

"Hey Isak" he answers groggily. "What's up?"

"Even" he starts panting. "Even, tell me it's not true, that you're not a fucking rapist!!" 

"What?" He ask sounding confused. 

"On the internet, Even! It says you were charged with sexual assault. What did you do? Its not true, right??" He asked.

He hears Even silently mutter _fuck_ and he starts panicking, "Isak, please just calm down. I can explain"

"Explain what?" He starts yelling. "Just tell me it's not true, just say no."

"Isak, just let me explain please." He begs

"So it's true?" He ask his hands shaking, "oh my fucking god, Even" he screams sinking to the floor, "You're a terrible person, don't talk to me again! " He cries as he hangs up, throwing his phone across the room and sobbing on the floor. 

He cries and cries. He feels disgusting and gross that he was falling for someone who was even capable of doing that. His skin is itching, wanting to get rid of Evens touch from his body and everything in his apartment. He feels like an idiot for just believing Even when he said it was just drugs when a simple Google search would of told him otherwise. 

He doesn't know how long he's been crying but he soon hears pounding at the door, "Isak, I'm sorry. Can we please talk?"

Isak cries even more hearing his voice through the door and he doesn't understand how someone who's so gentle with him can do something so awful, invasive and selfish to someone else.

"Isak, I don't want to wake up your neighbors. Please open the door, I'm sorry I lied to you. I need to explain the whole story. Please" He begs.

Even is right that doesn't want to disturb his neighbors and he also doesn't want to have this conversation through the door for his neighbors to hear the guy he was seeing was...awful

He gets up off the floor, wiping his face dry and walks to the front door and cracks it open, "Hi" Even says.

"I can't even look at you right now" He says looking down at the floor. "What do you want?" 

"Can I come in?"

"No." He says simply.

"I'm not going to hurt you, Isak"

Isak looks back up with a stern look, "You have 30 seconds before I close the door"

"Fine" Even sighs. "I'm sorry I lied to you. I knew you wouldn't want to hang out with me and--"

"I dont need an explanation, just tell me if you did it. If it's yes, I want nothing to do with you."

"That's what I went to prison for, yes but I technically didn't do it."

Isak rolls his eyes, "Can you stop with this cryptic stuff ? Can you be honest just for once and tell me you just wanted to sleep with me and take advantage of me. Just say it and own up to something for once."

"I didnt fucking do it, okay? I had sex with this girl, consensually. I didn't want anything more and she wouldn't accept that and people knew what happened and we weren't together so they were slutshaming her and her overprotective parents found out and so she claimed I raped her so she didn't get in trouble. When a girl says that, there's nothing you can fucking do, Isak and we did have sex and everyone knew so it wasn't that hard for the court to believe."

"So you just made up all that stuff about the drugs?"

"No" He sighs. "It is still true. I had already had the drug thing on my record so when they thought I did that, that was it for me. I couldn't win if I tried but I swear to you I didn't rape her. We were sober and she wanted it too."

Isak let's out a deep breath, clearly distraught and overwhelmed and looks up to Even, "You could be lying to me again, Even. I don't know what to believe"

"Isak, I swear I'm telling the truth. That's why I can't volunteer. I'm not supposed to be near schools and parks and stuff, or anywhere near kids. It's fucked up, I know that and I'm sorry. And I'm sorry for not telling you the truth before. I just--I really wanted you to get to know me, for me"

"But nothing was true, Even." He cries. "You lied to me for so long. What did you think would happen if I found out? Either way, you were lying so what credibility do you have for me to believe you. I don't want to believe it, Even"

"Isak" He says brings his thumb to wipe his tears and Isak moves Evens hand away, "please don't touch me."

"Isak, I swear on everything I didn't hurt that girl and I'm sorry for not telling you but I'm telling you everything now. Do you want to know all my shit, Isak? I'm bipolar, I've been to prison, Im a dropout, a lowlife with no plans for the future, I'm 29 and still rely on my parents but I want you Isak and I know you're too good for me, that's the truth."

Isak looks up at him in utter despair, "I'm just confused right now, Even so I just need some time"

"Will you call me?" Even asks.

Isak shrugs looking up at him with teary eyes, "I don't know yet"

Even accepts his fate and nods, disappointed. "I'll give you time, I'll just hopefully see you soon?"

Isak nods stepping back, "Bye" And he closes the door without waiting for a reply.

.

Isak doesn't speak to Even for weeks, it feels good to have Jonas back in his life so he can talk to him about it. Even has tried reaching out on multiple occasions to Isak, giving him space but still to let him know he's still thinking about him. 

Isak tries to not think about it too much but he's frankly confused. He knows how the justice system works and sometimes people are wrongly incriminated but Even's confession doesn't put him any more at ease. He wants to believe it isn't true but even if if it's isn't, Even still lied to him. 

About four weeks after the incident, Isak is getting ready for work when Even text him

_hey, are you working tonight _

_yeah, but I don't know if I want to see you there. _

_I won't go to the show, I just want to prove to you I didn't do it. I can meet you outside?_

_okay, i_ _work at 10_

_._

When Isak is walking down the street, duffle bag on his shoulder, he spots Even near the entrance with someone else beside him. Isak walks up to him, tapping his shoulder and Even turns around and says hi and how much he misses him.

"What did you want to show me?" Isak ask uninterested.

"This is Sofia" He says gesturing to her. "The girl" he says not needing to preface.

"Hi, I'm sorry about this whole mess. Even found me on Facebook and told me what happened. I've felt guilty about what I did for so long. I was so stupid and selfish for making that up and I'm sorry for ruining your relationship. He didn't you know--do that to me. He was actually really sweet until I realized he didnt want anything serious. I was embarassed and made up that lie. Iwas young and stupid, not realizing I messed his life up so I'm very sorry." She looks up at Even and gives him another apology. "So um I guess I'll leave you two to talk." She says giving an awkward wave goodbye. 

Isak hasn't looked at Even since Sofia started speaking. He's looking at the ground and sees Even stepping closer. Even gently takes his hand and Isak shakes his head, dropping his hand, "My shift is starting soon" He says and heads inside without a word. 

Throughout Isaks entire shift, he's lost and distracted by earlier events. His body is on auto pilot, moving his body but his mind is elsewhere. When he finishes work several hours later, he's heading out when he opens his phone and shoots even a message,

_im heading home, come over _

_okay_

_._

When Isak gets upstairs to his apartment, he sees Even standing in front of his door.

"Hi" Isak greets. Even shoots him a half hearted smile as he steps aside giving Isak room to open the door. He unlocks the door and the two step inside. Isak gathers on his couch, kicking his shoes off and bringing his knees to his chest in the way that Even loves. Even sits a couple feet away and breaks the silence, "Thanks for having me over."

"I'm overwhelmed, Even" He admits looking up at him. 

"Why?"

"This, everything with you is a lot. It's more than I ever could of imagined. But I also like you, a lot. I heard everything the girl said and I believe you but--" He sighs. "You lied to me about something so big for so long."

"I was trying to protect you, Isak but I know now that I did it all wrong. I've never done this with anyone since I got out, had something get this far so I'm figuring it out. And I'm fucking up along the way but just know that I do have feelings for you and everything I do is to protect you. I never want to burden you with my life and my past. I'm really sorry."

Isak feels a tear fall down in his cheek, "I forgive you but if this is ever going to work, I need complete honesty. I don't care if you think not telling me is for my benefit, I need to know or I can't do it"

"Can't do what?" Even ask teasingly with a smirk on his face.

"Even!!!!" He whines. "You know what I'm talking about" Isak says kicking his leg.

"I'm not sure I do, Isak. Honesty, remember?" He says raising his brows.

Isak tightens his hold around his knees and mutters, "Do you want to be exclusive?" He ask nervously.

Even smiles and nods, "Yes."

"Okay." Isak blushes. "You're on probation though." He says narrowing his gaze. Even gives him a come here motion and Isak crawls across the couch to sit on Evens lap. Even caresses his back, looking up at him with a genuine eyes, "Thank you" He says honestly. "For giving me a chance"

Isak nods, looking down at him, bringing his hand to his cheek and softly kissing his lips. They give each soft and longing pecks before Isak sucks on bottom lip, indicating he would like a little more from the kiss and Even reciprocates with just as much enthusiasm. Isaks arms linger around his neck as Even's hands stay put on Isaks lower back. They kiss until their jaws are hurting and Isak is sleepy so they head into Isaks room and snuggle each other to sleep."

.

Things had gotten a lot better between the couple, more secure. Things were rocky in the beginning because Isak was still working to forget the past but they've made immeasurable progress in the past 2 months. Isak and Even are currently at the holiday market, walking through and checking out the vendors. Isak spots a thermal vendor and heads over, Even following. He picks out a black beanie and purchases it. He then hands it over to Even, "Want me to hold it?" His boyfriend ask.

"It's for you. You never have a hat, I don't want you to get sick."

Even chuckles and leans down to kiss his lips, "Thank you" He slides the hat on, checking with Isak if it looks good and Isak reassures him that it does.

They interlock hands and continue to roam the market. They grab cups of hot cider and take a seat under the warm holiday lights.

"Christmas is my favorite holiday" Isak says leaning his head on Evens shoulder.

"I can see that, you love decorating and being all cozy. How do you usually celebrate?"

"Well the past couple of years, I just decorate my place, I order from my favorite restaurant and they do a holiday special. I usually watch my favorite Christmas movies and make cookies. Do you usually do anything?"

"Yeah, I usually go to holiday parties or something that a friend may be hosting. Always spend the morning with my parents but that's usually it. So will this be your first Christmas in a relationship?" Even ask as his and Isaks fingers dance on each other's. 

"Mhm." Isak smiles to himself and holds Evens hand firmly, bringing their hands to his mouth and pecks the back of his boyfriend's hand. "I'm really excited. I can't wait to find your present." 

"Isak, I really want to find a job. I hate that I can't take you places or get you a gift without asking my parents for help." Even admits. 

Isak lifts his head up and turns Evens head to him, "It's not like you didn't try, it's very hard and discouraging when jobs keep rejecting you. You don't have to worry about getting me a gift, okay?"

Even shrugs, Isaks words clearly not doing much for him.

"Would you want to work with me?" Isak ask

"I can't strip, I don't want guys watching me like that. And you know, if they touch me, I'll have to hurt them." 

Isak chuckles, "Okay, well what about bartending?" He pitches.

Even shrugs, "I'm open to it, it's just whether or not your manager would want me."

"I'll talk to him" Isak says definitely and rests his head back on Even shoulder. He plays with the rings on Evens fingers as they watch the passerby in holiday spirit.

.

"Even...Even" Isak whines. "It feels so good"

Isak bites down on his lips and let's out a deep breath as Even continues to expertly work his hands on him.

"Right there Even" 

"Babe, I'm gonna need you to stop moaning like that if you don't want me to get hard against your back" Even says as he continues to work his oiled up hands down Isaks spine.

Isak giggles, "Sorry, it just feels really nice. Today was a lot, so much assignments and work was a pain."

"Well, I'll massage you every night if that's what you wanted."

Isak smiles and tilts his head back, asking for a kiss. Even leans down and grants Isak his kiss but as the latter goes to pull away, Isak whines and flips onto his back pulling Even down for a longer kiss. He locks his legs behind Evens back and slides his tongue in his mouth. They make out for about a minute until Even feels Isaks hand trailing down his stomach and suddenly squeezing his semi. Even pulls back with a muffled groan, looking down at Isak. Isak looks up shyly and Even questions him with his eyes.

"Why haven't you asked me? " He ask quietly. "To have sex?"

Even shrugs, "Why didn't you ask me?" 

"I don't know, I thought you would."

Even caresses Isaks soft cheeks and ask, "Is that something you want to do now?"

Isak nervously bites down his bottom lip and nods.

"If you want to touch me, you can. And we can have actual sex another day because I don't have anything on me. Do you?"

Isak shakes his head and pulls Even back down for a kiss as his hands trail down his abdomen, tucking on the waistband of his pants. He slides his hand inside and wraps his hand around his boyfriend's dick. Their lips stay attached as Isak works his hand, feeling Even hardening up by the second.

He pulls back from the kiss, pushing Even back to sit on the couch as he slides Evens pants off, his erection flops back, hitting his chest. Isak takes a moment to finally look. He can't help but think Even has a pretty dick. Everything is so tight and firm and pink and begging to be touched. He picks his hand up and wraps him hand around Even and begins stroking him slowly. 

Even bites down on his lips and stares at Isak after he wet his hand before touching him. He brings his thumb up to wipe the tip and continues stroking his shaft, moving a little faster and watches Evens head fall back on the couch.

"So like, I'm sure you've done this a lot. Is there anything you like or want me to do?" He ask eager to please.

Isak leans in to kiss Evens inner thighs to grab his attention. Evens head jerks up, looking down at Isak with low eyes.

"Did you hear me?" Isak ask, movements unwavering.

"What?" He ask already too turned on to focus on anything else. 

"Is this okay? Is there anything else you're into, to make this better?"

Isak is giving him the most innocent look as he's kneeled on the floor, asking what more he could do and Even could make himself come right now from just how cute Isak looks in front of him.

"You can tell me" Isak says, taking his silence for reluctance. "Honesty, please"

Even clears his throat, "I like um--like blowjobs. Like gagging but we don't have to do that now."

"It's okay" Isak smiles, stroking his dick faster. He confidently leans in and gives a lick to the tip and hears Even let out a guttural moan. He leans in and takes Even in his mouth, sucking up and down his shaft without hesitation. 

"God, you're so good at this, baby. Fuck" He groans. He sucks down and back up, popping Evens tip out of his mouth. He continues in that routine until hes pulling off and tells Even, "We can do the gagging thing"

"Are you sure?"

Isak smiles, looking up at him, "Do whatever you want to me"

"God Isak" Even groans. "You can't say stuff like that, it does things to me"

Isak chuckles as Even tells him he can keep going. Isak gives a few more sucks and when he goes back down, he feels Evens hand on the back of his head, keeping him in place as he fucks up into his mouth. He hears Even make the loudest groan all night before pulling out. Even tells Isak to keep his mouth open and he slaps his hard and heavy erection against Isaks tongue who's looking up at him with teary eyes from choking and it sends shivers down Evens spine and blood to his dick.

He holds his dick by the base and the back of Isaks head as he pushes Isak back down so he's completely deepthroating him. It's not easy, Isak thinks. He feels his throat trying to reject it and tears falling down his face but he finds himself loving every second of it. Even starts fucking into his mouth and Isak keeps his mouth open, eager to take whatever Even is giving him. 

Even keeps bucking his hips up in short thrusts and growling every time Isak chokes, like he can't get enough. 

Even stops and holds Isaks head up by his chin, "Is this okay?"

Isak nods wiping the saliva lingering on his mouth.

"Would you be able to do it lying down?" He suggests.

Isak nods and gets up to lie back against the couch and Even stands up and hovers above him. He quickly leans down to kiss his lips, "If it's too much, just punch my leg or something, okay?" Isak agrees as he opens his mouth, waiting for Even. And the fact that Isak is so willing, he's so unbelievably lucky. Even holds his dick, only giving Isak the head, teasing them both. Even moves a little further up the couch until he's balls deep and when it's feeling particularly good, he keeps his hips still, letting Isak gag on it, getting off on the noise. He pulls out, looking down to check in on Isak who's leaning up, eager to get his mouth back on him. He continues to fuck his mouth, gag him, wreck his throat until he feels himself getting desperately close. He warns Isak who places his hand on Evens waist, keeping him in place, wanting him to finish in his mouth. Even starts fucking his mouth a little faster and when he feels his insides start trembling he stays put in Isak mouth, hips infrequently thrusting, chasing the orgasm as he comes down Isaks fucked out throat. He pulls back and collapses on top of Isak whos coughing repeatedly. He lazily sits up checking if he's okay and Isak nods, getting up to get water. He comes back and curls into Even's body, "Was it good? "

If Even could, he would get hard again from how sore and exhausted Isaks voice sounded. He kisses the life out of him and just mumbles, "You're something else."

Isak chuckles, looking up at him, "What does that mean?"

"That you seem so innocent and just I don't know---I wouldn't have expected you to be that good. To even consider what I was into"

"I just want to make you feel good." Isak shares. 

"Well I want to make you feel good, too" Even recpriocates. "Do you need me to do anything?" 

Isak kisses his lips and shakes his head, "Not right now. Next time, maybe?" Even agrees with a nod so Isak takes the time to ask, "So like what we just did, it was like obviously a little rough, right? Like is that what you're into? Like during sex too?"

Even shrugs as if he's unsure what the right answer is. "I guess but I don't expect us to do that the first time or anything."

"I wouldn't mind." Isak says. "I mean not like completely overwhelming but maybe just a little aggressive. I like it when you get like that." He confesses, looking up at him and caresses his cheek. 

Even softly smiles, "It's just weird because I've always been ashamed of that. Like I know I can be rough and protective and I was just taught to really hate that part of me though it's hard to control so I'm glad you're kind of into it a bit."

"In bed, yeah and being a little protective is cute. But nothing crazy or anything to get in trouble with the law, okay?"

"Yeah, for sure" Even says tightening his grip on Isaks waist, pulling him closer. "So you've had sex before, right ? And relationships and such?"

"Sex, yeah. But this is my first relationship." He admits. 

"Really? Why?" Even ask.

"Um well, it's not that I didn't want one. I've had several prospects and it got close several times but it seemed like whenever I got intimate with any of them, they weren't interested in anything going further. I think its because they knew what I did and expected it to end after we had sex so I started holding out and then I just realized the guys weren't right for me anyway. There were only three but yeah, you're my first serious thing. What about you?"

"I've had a relationship in high school with a girl but we ended things after a couple years and you're the only one since. I've slept with a handful of people but it was always understood like this is just a hook up, you know?"

Isak nods in understanding and rest his head on Evens chest and listens to his heartbeat, "How many is a handful exactly?" 

Even clears his throat and hesitantly says, "Nine. I think that's pretty okay, right?" 

Isak shrugs, "Ive heard a lot more. And you're ancient so that makes sense." He teases.

Even gasps dramatically at the indirect insult and Isak giggles, kissing his full lips, "I think we should shower." He suggests. 

"Me too" Even agrees as they both get up and head to the bathroom. 

.

There's a couple of days until Christmas so Even knew what to expect at the show. Isak had told them his work is getting rather festive this season but it still didn't prepare him for when Isak came out in short sparkly pleather red shorts, green suspenders attached to them, a garter belt on his thigh with a mistle toe attached.

It takes a solid minute before he closes his gaping mouth and comes back to reality and uses all his attention to refrain from getting a boner. He watches Isak in amazement, in disbelief that he's his. That he gets to kiss him and hold him and go home with him. He has done something right in the world to have been gifted with Isak. He walks a little closer to the show and smiles in adoration at his boy. He's even able to block out some of the disgusting heckling. Isak keeps his eyes locked on Evens when he's slowly and teasingly getting rid of his suspenders and never leaves his gaze as his thumbs tug at the front of his shorts suggestively. 

Even keeps himself cool and collected until Isak is finally done and Even is a little eager to leave. It's freezing out so he waits in the car and keeps checking for Isak. He finally leaves and Even opens the car door, calling out his name to let him know where he is. Isak joins him soon in the passenger seat and leans over and gives him a kiss.

"Thanks for coming." Isak smiles shyly up at him.

"Of course, it was amazing. You get more beautiful everyday, Isak. I'm so lucky." 

He blushes and pulls his legs up to his chest as usual and looks out the window.

"Everything okay?" Even ask, noticing Isaks weird demeanor. 

Isak nods "Just some guy." He mumbles.

"What do you mean?"

Isak turns to him and says, "There's this guy. He comes all the time. Says he wants to see me. And every time he's telling me to go home with him and telling me all this stuff he wants do to me. Even, I hate it and tonight --" Isak sighs closing his eyes. 

"Did he touch you?" Even ask already fuming. 

Isak nods, "No one saw. He touched my butt and told me he was tired of waiting for me and will eventually gets what he wants. He thinks because he gives me money when I dance that I should--you know."

Even feels his blood boiling and punches the steering wheel, "He is not going to fucking touch you again. Do you hear me, Isak? And I will make sure those people are doing their fucking job. This shouldn't be happening. Who was it, where did he go?"

"He's still there, he knows some of the bouncers so he always stays late. He's tall, dark hair, he always wears a suit."

Even gets out of the car and starts pacing but takes a moment to set aside his anger and think about Isak. He climbs into the car and leans over to give Isak a kiss, "I really want to hurt him but I don't want to do anything you don't want me to or that will scare you. If he comes out, can I say something to him? He needs to know that's not okay."

Isak is hesitant but it's been happening for too long, he feels there's no other option. But he also doesnt want Even to get in trouble for fighting or anything related to the police potentially having to be called, "Just talk to him, don't fight him, okay?" Even nods and squeezes his leg and tells Isak he'll be back. Isak locks the door and turns around in his seat and watches Even walking back to the venue, impatiently waiting several feet away. 

It takes between five and ten minutes for the guy to leave and Isak watches Even clenching his fists. Isak knows he's resolved problems his whole life with his fists so unlearning that is a little hard but he knows he cant navigate the world this way anymore. He's not 17 anymore. Isak watches with wide eyes, unsure of exactly what's happening as he watches Even push the man up against the brick wall. But thankfully Even is walking back seconds later and hops in the car, and takes a moment to collect himself. 

"What happened?" Isak ask.

"I just told him not to touch you again or to even come back here or he's going to regret it. He seemed sufficiently scared so I think you'll be okay." 

"Thank you" Isak says. "I really hope he doesn't come back."

"So about this little show you were giving me?" Even smiles, changing the subject to something a little lighter as he drives off.

.

_hey, w_h_at are you doing?_

_im at home, are you in class?_

_no, I came by work_

_during the day?_

_mhmm. to ask my manager about you_

_what did he say?_

_you should get down here in 15. dress decent :) _

_be right there _

_._

Isak sees Even come running into the club about 15 minutes later dressed in a button down and fitted black jeans, running over to Isak and the manager. He reaches out to shake his his hand, "Hi, Im Even."

"Hi, Even. Follow me." He greets and Even looks down at Isak who smiles and wishes him luck as they head to the back and Isak waits outside of the club. 

.

Even sits down in the seat across from the wooden desk as the manager sits across from him, "Isak recommended you and vouched and said to give you a chance. And he's one of my best dancers so I trust anyone he thinks will be good here, what do you have to offer?"

"Im not-- did he mention you know--my record and stuff?"

"Yes he did." The manager replies in a blase tone

"Okay just wanted to make sure you knew but I haven't worked for years since I've been out because no one will hire me so I dont have a CV or much experience but I do have passion for everything I do. I work hard and am good with people and given the opportunity, I can really do good work. I know its not much for me to say it but Isak is vouching for me for a reason, and I dont think he would screw up his own relationship with you if he thought I would be a terrible employee."

"You're right, Even. I dont have much to go on but your word so Im giving you a week. A week to show me what you can do and if we get no complaints, you can stay on."

Even tries to contain his smile but politely nods, "That sounds great sir, I'll show you that I'll be a good fit." 

Even is handed paperwork to fill out and is told to return in in two days for his first shift at 8 in the evening. Even agrees, shakes his hand once more and leaves the office, hurriedly looking for Isak. He runs out of the club and finds Isak leaning back against Evens car and he runs up to him, "I got it Isak, I got it." He shares unable to contain his excitment. "I mean its a trial run but still."

Isak squeals and hugs him, "I knew you would. Im so happy for you." He smiles pulling back and caressing his cheek, "You're too charming for anyone to say no." Isak smirks.

"I couldnt have done it without you though. I dont know how to ever repay you, baby." 

Isak shakes his head and tightens his arms around Even's waist, "You dont need to do anything." 

Even leans down to kiss Isaks lips and Isak happily reciprocates. Isak's lips are a little frozen and a little numb but it doesnt stop him from intensifying the kiss a little bit, immensly proud of Even.

.

When Christmas Eve comes, Isak is elated. He wakes up a little before 8 and slides on his slippers, throws a loose creme knit sweater on over his briefs and heads to the living room. He plugs in his tree and lights around his ceiling and puts on his holiday spotify playlist as he makes himself some pancakes. He dances around the kitchen in bliss, watching his batter bubble up in the pan.

When his pancakes are all done, he drizzles them in syrup and stops his music and gathers on the couch to eat his pancakes and put on a Christmas film on Netflix.

About a half hour into the movie, he receives a text from Even,

_merry christmas eve, beautiful. what are you up to? can I come over a little later? _

_merry christmas eve. and of course :) just let me know when you're on your way. _

_._

Isak in the midst of making sugar cookies when he hears his doorbell. He groans because his hands are awfully messy from the batter. He grabs a paper towel and uses it to turn the doorknob.

Even smiles and leans in to kiss him when he sees Isak who steps back, "Careful, I have flour and batter all over me."

Even chuckles and kisses him anyway and closes the door behind himself.

"You're really going all out, huh?" Even ask seeing the disarray in the kitchen. 

"I always do." He says returning to his work. "Can you turn down my music for me?" Even drops his bag and grabs Isaks phone off the counter, turning down his playlist. 

"What's in the bag?" Isak ask.

"Your present." 

Isak looks up with the biggest smile, "You got me a present?"

"Of course, with money from my own paycheck too."

Isak smiles and kisses him, proudly because the manager has hired Even full time, impressed with his work ethic. "What did you get me?"

"I can't spoil the surprise. You have to wait until tomorrow."

Isak pouts, his hand still working the cookie batter. "Please."

Even shakes his head and kisses the back of his neck, "Do you need help with this?"

"No, just stay in here with me. So did your parents not care that you are over here on Christmas Eve?"

Even shakes his head, "I spent the morning with them. Speaking of...they really want to meet you. Would you be okay with that? Maybe tomorrow?"

Isak looks up startled and stutters over his words but eventually says, "S-sure, yeah. That's fine."

"And they'll cook us dinner and stuff. Does that sound okay?" 

Isak smiles nervously up at him and nods, "Ive never done the whole meet the parents thing. I'm a little scared."

"Hey, there's no reason to be. I raved so much about you that they already love you. It's just you coming to eat, that's it."

Isak bites his inner lip and nods as he forms the dough into circles and places them on his baking pan and slides them in the preheated oven. He washes and dries his hands and turns to Even, "Do you have a movie reguest?"

"Have you watched Polar Express yet?"

"No but we can now" He says skipping into the living room but not before grabbing the bag off the floor that holds his present and runs to the couch to dig into it but Even is two seconds behind him, and wraps his arm around his abdomen, picking him up and pulling him back from the bag, "Tomorrow, Isak." He says placing him down and grabbing the bag and putting it behind the couch. 

"Was thinking I could sleep over and you can have it first thing in the morning."

"Fine" He says stubbornly sticking his tongue out at him as he grabs his remote and crawls under the fuzzy blanket. Even joins him , climbing behind him to spoon him as Isak puts the film on and the smell of yummy sugar cookies starts to fill the house.

They spend the evening eating all the sweets and watching films and cuddling and kissing and talking until it's nearing midnight and Isak is trying to stay awake to ring in Christmas.

When it hits midnight, Isak is immediately hit with a surge of energy as he jumps up on his knees on the bed, "Merry Christmas!!"

Even chuckles lying back against the bed, lazily smiling up at him

'Can I open my present now?"

"Mhmm, I don't want you to expect too much." He warns.

"Oh hush." Isak dismisses and gets up to grab the bag and hops back on the bed. He enthusiastically throws out the decorative tissue paper and pulls out a box. Isak gives Even a confused glance and opens it and there's so much stuff. There's face masks, body scrub, candles, Isaks favorite snacks and so many items. Isak pulls out the card and reads it,

_Merry Christmas, Isak_

_I know it's not the best or most luxurious but it's what I could do with the couple of paychecks I have. I hope you like it though. I know how important self care is for you which is why I got this. I tell you all the time how much you mean to me and I guess I'll tell you again. But you've changed my world and showed me how to love, how to be caring and be soft and gentle and I'm so grateful to have met you, much less be with you. Can't wait to make more memories together._

_Yours,_

_Even_

Isak fondly pouts, looking up at Even.

"I know it's not--" Isak cuts Even off with a kiss. He brings his hand to his jaw and gently kisses his lips. He pulls back so their foreheads are pressed together and his thumb softly grazes Evens lips, "I love you"

Even eyes glance up to Isaks and he pulls Isak back into a kiss, "I love you too. So much" Even flips them over so he has Isak on his back and Isak intuitively wraps his legs around Evens waist. They make out for a while before Isak starts tugging up at Evens shirt. Even sits up and tugs it off and takes off Isaks sweater. Even kisses Isak briefly before kissing down his jaw to his neck, kissing and marking his pale skin. 

Isak moans his name as he presses his hand against Even's butt, begging for friction and Even starts grinding on top of him as his lips stay marking up his boy. 

Isak is impatient, heavily panting trying to take off Evens briefs though they're pressed firmly together.

"Baby....babe" Isak whines.

Even pulls back from his neck and looks down at Isak who presses his hands to cheeks, "I need you. Something, please." He begs. 

Even tugs Isaks briefs off and kisses down his chest slowly, giving Isak the attention he deserves. 

He kisses down to his midriff teasingly and moves down to his soft thighs. He starts kissing and sucking the skin of his inner thighs, feeling Isak hardening against his hand that's holding his legs open. 

Isak is biting dwn roughly on his bottom lip as he tilts his head up and sees Even being an absolute tease. He turns Evens face to look at him and takes a hold of his growing erection, thrusting his hips up to indicate his desires.

Even smirks and wraps his large hand around Isaks dick and leans in to suck on the head, looking up. Even watched Isaks head fall back in ecstasy.

"Look at me." Even demands.

Isak leans up on his elbows, looking down at Even. And Isak looks absolutely well fucked and it's only been about 10 minutes. 

Even maintains eye contact with Isak as he slaps Isaks dick against his tongue and swirls his tongue around the head before diving down to take him in his mouth and pulls off, looking at Isak who is shaking his head, "Don't stop."

Even grabs the base of his erection and bobs his head up and down, ravishing Isak to give him the best blowjob he's ever received. He takes him completely down his throat for several moments and pulls off briefly to lean up and kiss Isak who eagerly kisses him back, "I want you inside me, Even." He breathes out. 

"I still don't have anything on me." Even says defeated. 

Isak calms down a bit to reach into his bedside table and pulls out a box of condoms and small bottle of lube, "I picked some up after last time."

He lies back down and runs his fingers through his sweaty hair and ask seductively but without even trying, can they have sex.

And Even doesn't hesitate to say yes before resuming their kiss. They're turned on and impatient but Even tries to slow things down a bit and pulls back, catching his breath.

"We need to calm down or we're going to finish before I even get inside you."

Isak shakes his head, "Don't let that happen."

Even uncaps the new bottle and pours some on his fingers as he looks down at Isak who's watching him attentively. 

"Why are you so beautiful?" Even ask.

Isak smiles and rolls his eyes, "Shut up."

"I'm serious" Even laughs, leaning down to nuzzle his nose, "Most beautiful man, I swear. You're the man of my dreams."

Isak smiles, tilting his head to kiss Evens lips before Even slides down Isaks body and lifts his legs in the air.

He kisses Isaks hole before bringing his lubed up middle finger to circle his rim before pushing his finger in. He watches Isak take it until he's three fingers deep with Isaks dick in his mouth and the younger boy is crying out that he needs Even inside of him now, he can't wait anymore. 

As Even slides a condom on, the sensible part that's still left in Isaks brain reminds him to talk about getting tested because he wants to feel Even bare inside of him. If he wasn't already rock hard, he would get hard just thinking about it.

"Ready, baby?" Even ask as he has the back of Isaks thighs up against his chest, completely folding him over as his dick grazes his hole.

"Mhm" He nods. He feels exposed but also can't bring himself to care enough when Even pushes in. Isak can't describe what he feels at the moment. 

Hes overwhelmed, he feels bliss, he feels stretched. He feels safe. He feels like he's already on the brink of orgasm. He opens his eyes and watches Even trying to gently bottom out and he holds back a smile because Even just cares for him so much. Isak is stretched enough that there's no adjustment period. As soon as Even is buried inside of him, he starts moving his hips in a rhymtic motion. 

Even is kneeled on one leg and the other with his foot pressed flat against the bed as he fucks him at an angle, a wave of pleasure surging through Isaks body.

"That feels amazing" he groans. Isaks gaze is low as he looks up at the ceiling to his white Christmas lights, and it's all kind of blurry and there seems to be triple of each lightbulb. He's in an uninterrupted bliss as Even fucks him. 

Isak is coherent enough to know Even is making this beautiful and romantic and my god, it is but Isak just needs everything right now. Maybe he was more sex deprived than he thought or maybe Evens dick is really that good but he pulls Even down to him and mutters in his ear, "I want it hard. Please baby, give it to me." He cries desperately.

"I don't want to hurt you." Even admits as his thrusts slow down. 

"It's okay. I love you, I trust you. Please, I want it" He insists.

Even leans down to kiss Isak, lying on top of him while he stays inside him. Its a deep and sensual kiss and while their lips are locked, Even starts to pick up the pace of his thrusts. He buries his face in Isaks shoulder as he pounds his hole and the bottom wraps his legs tight around Even. 

"It feels so good, Even. You're gonna make me come." He cries out. 

When Even pulls back from his shoulder and holds Isaks leg up by his thighs and starts penetrating him harder, Isak feels himself slipping into abyss as he grabs into the sheets to try to ground himself. He knows hes muttering profanities but can't hear them as he watches Even wreck him and he knows he's about to have the best orgasm. He wraps his hand around himself and strokes himself erratically until hes on edge, his entire body trembling in anticipation as he comes all over his stomach. 

Seconds later, he feels Even pull out of him and is soon coming on his chest with animalistic grunts but Isaks too gone to open his eyes to enjoy the sight that is Even shooting all over him.

The room is soon only filled with the sound of heavy, steady breathing. He still hasn't opened his eyes, he's still recovering. He still feels like Even is inside of him, like one feels like they're still on a boat after getting off.

"You okay?" He hears Even ask him, nuzzling into his side. 

Isak whines and takes a few moments and finally opens his eyes and stares up at Even.

Even leans down to kiss his lips and grabs a towel off of Isaks desk chair and wipes Isaks abdomen down and throws it into his hamper. Even turns the air on and pulls the blanket above their bodies and kisses Isaks shoulder, "I can tell youre exhausted. Lets go to sleep."

And within minutes, Isak is out like a light. 

.

Isak wakes up to lights hitting his eyelids and Christmas music. His eyes flutter open and he's disoriented for a bit before remembering what happened yesterday and that today is Christmas. He sits up in bed and wipes his eyes and looks around the room. He grabs Evens t shirt to cover his naked body and eases out of bed. He puts on his slippers and walks into the kitchen to see Even making breakfast.

Isak watches fondly from the entryway, leaning against the wall, "Morning" He says softly.

Even looks up startled and eventually smiles, walking over to Isak, "Morning" He gives him a delicate kiss before pulling back, "Are you okay? Last night was good?"

Isak nods, "I'm okay and last night was incredible." He says wrapping his around him. 

"I thought so too, you felt so good."

Isak blushes and pushes Even back, "Don't start or we're going to have to abandon breakfast."

Even chuckles as Isak tells Even he's going to freshen up as he finishes in the kitchen. Isak heads to the bathroom and immediately screams, "Even, what did you do to my neck??" 

Isak storms out pointing at the catastrophe when Even shrugs, "I got carried away."

"I'm supposed to meet your parents today, what am I supposed to do?" He questions incredulously 

"It's not that bad." Even says walking closer to him and tilting his head to the side to look at it, "Okay maybe just wear a turtleneck or something." He suggests.

Isak rolls his eyes and hops in the shower, brushing his teeth, washing his face and returning in his holiday onesie and joins Even on the couch. After breakfast, Isak gives Even his present. Even reluctantly takes it and hesitantly opens the bag.

He pulls out a jewelry box and opens it up to see a golden pendant that mimics constellations. 

"It's how the stars were aligned on the night we met. " He explains shyly.

"You just keep getting cuter, don't you?" He jokes. "Thank you" He says leaning over to kiss him and pulls out the card. He opens the envelope and pulls out a piece of paper and Isak adds, "So you remember to take care of yourself" And the paper is a pass for a spa day and Isak is almost too thoughtful, Evens getting a little emotional.

"Read the card when I'm not with you" Isak says. Even nods and stuffs everything in the bag and pulls Isak into a hug, "So in love with you, Isak." They spend the rest of the day being touchy and clingy until they need to head to Evens parents. Isak does choose to wear a turtleneck because he really doesn't want _that_ to be Evens parents first impression of him. He wears a red turtle neck and black pants and boots and wets his hair. And they leave together that evening. 

Isak is a bit nervous, it's normal but he hopes the cookies he made will be a good introduction. Even unlocks the door to the house and takes Isaks hand, leading him inside.

"I'm home, Isaks with me." He calls out as he closes the front door. Evens home is also festive with an array of decorations. A woman and man come running out of the kitchen, "Isak!" His mom cheers. "Feels like I've waited forever to meet you." She says when she approaches. "I'm Sigrid." She says pulling him into a hug. "And this is my husband, Jan" She introduces as Jan takes him in for a hug. 

"We're glad you're here, Isak."

"I am too, I made cookies." He says holding up the platter. Jan thanks him and takes the tray to the kitchen as Isak takes his coat off. 

"He's cute." Sigrid says to Even who rolls his eyes, "Don't embarrass me" When Isak kicks off his shoes, he takes his hand, "We're gonna hang in the living room, let us know when dinner is ready." He says to his parents before heading for the couch.

"Did you underestimate how cute I was or something?" Isak smirks when they're comfortable on the sofa.

"I couldn't even if I tried. They were asking for pictures and everything but I spared them because I knew they had to see the beauty in person"

Isak chuckles and kisses Evens cheek, "I haven't had dinner with a family for a while. I'm quite excited for home cooked meal from parents."

"Theyre gonna fill you up, they love feeding people. All the food they make is so goood" Even groans just thinking about it. 

They keep chatting casually before they're being called for dinner and there's platters and bowls and plates of so much food on top of the table that would take weeks for them to fully consume. 

"Lets dive in, guys!" Jan says as they each grab bowls and plates, filling their plates with whatever their hearts desire. Natural conversation falls between the four that Isak almost forgets it's his first time meeting the two adults. They laugh and joke on each other until their bellies are filled and they're cleaning up the table. Isak is in the kitchen helping Sigrid with the dishes when he feels a tap on his shoulder and turns around to see Evens dad who gestures for Isak to follow him. Isak looks startled and dries his hands as he reluctantly follows wondering where Even disappeared to.

Jan is leading them down steps to what seems like his sanctuary of sorts.

They sit on the couch before Isak ask nervously, "Is everything alright?"

"Yeah, yeah. No need to worry or anything. I just wanted to know how it was going with Even."

"Ehm, it's good. It's going well" He answers a little confused

"Are you sure? I know my son's a lot and he comes with some baggage, I just wanted to make sure you were okay."

Isak understands and nods, "We've talked about it and I think we're at a good place. That was all a different time in his life and I get that."

"And his bipolar disorder." Jan says. "You guys have discussed it?"

"Only a little bit. I mean I know he has it and what it means but not necessarily how to handle it." He explains.

"I think you should talk about it. I just want to make sure you know everything so it all goes well. I'm very happy Even found someone like you so I hope you guys just talk and are on the same page. Me and his mom didn't think this would happen for him so it's quite nice to have you over for Christmas."

"Well I'm quite lucky to have him." Isak smiles. "And thankful he has you guys."

Jan squeezes his shoulder in appreciation, "Lets head back up"

.

Meanwhile Even is up in his bedroom finally reading the card that Isak had given him earlier that morning. 

He's sat on his bed as he pulls the card out of the envelope and it's a simple christmas green card and his eyes are immediately taken aback by the entire card filled with writing. 

He takes a breath before reading,

_merry christmas ❤ so excited to spend my favorite holiday with you. I just want you to know I love you so so much. Im hoping i worked up the courage to tell you before you read this. I love you for not judging me, for always protecting me, always reminding me how much you care for me. I've never experienced something like this before, something so real and it is a little scary to be honest but when i kiss you and hold you and just look at you, im reminded that it's so worth it. it feels so good to be loved by you. you love me so beautifully. I don't think you even know how good of a boyfriend you are and how grateful I am everyday that you chose me and I chose you. when i started my job, i had convinced myself a relationship wasn't going to be for me. it couldn't happen, and even if I stopped, guys would be reluctant to be with someone who used their body for money and then I met you. someone who was able to see past it and see me for me and it's probably because you're so used to people being presumptuous about your own past, that you don't judge that much. I remember when we got together I told you I was scared. I was scared that everything you did in the past might be resurface and ruin the stability and comfort I created for myself but I'm never scared anymore. Being around you makes me feel so safe and Even, there's so much I've gone through and have lost faith and hope so many times again but being with you is one of the few things im sure of and I can't wait to keep spending my life with you _

_Isak_

Even is sobbing by the time he's done. And Even isn't a cryer and he can't remember the last time he cried but right now, he couldn't help himself. He throws the card aside and runs downstairs, trying to find his boyfriend. He sees his mom in the kitchen, frantically asking where's Isak.

"He's downstairs with your dad, what's wrong, honey?" She ask concerned. 

Even doesn't take the time to respond and and heads to the staircase to the basement and sees Isak and his dad walking up the steps. 

When Isak reaches the top step and smiles up at Even, trying to say hi, Even pushes Isak back against the wall and kisses the life out of him unashamed that his dad is there. Jans eyes widen as he skirts past the two, leaving them to their privacy.

Isak tries to keep up with the kiss, considering how sudden it was but Even had his hands all over him and Isak has to pull back to catch his breath, "Baby, your dad was right...were you crying?" Isak ask, brows furrowed. 

"I read your card" Even says breathlessly 

"I told you not to read it when im here." Isak whines. 

"You weren't with me" Even justifies. "That's why I was crying, it was--i couldn't believe it was even for me. The way you talk about me..." He shakes his head in disbelief.

"You're amazing." He pecks his lips. "I love you so so much. And I meant every word."

Even kisses him again and mutters, "Make me feel like my card to you was shit" He chuckles. 

"No, I loved it." Their foreheads are pressed together, they're in some sort of lovers euphoria, realizing how committed they are and what this means for them.

"You boys ready for Isaks cookies for dessert?" Sigrid calls out. 

"Just want to be alone with you right now" Even admits 

"You have to try my cookies first and then maybe I'll let you take me home." He teases as he takes Evens hand and they gather in the living room, around the television playing _A Christmas Story_ and the family gathers and starts diving into the cookies and pies on the coffee table. Isak leans back against Even's chest and pulls the throw blanket up to cuddle in as he eats his dessert. He glances out the window to watch the snow decorate the streets and back up at Even.

"What?" Even ask looking down at him. Isak shakes his head and looks back at the TV, just taking in the moment and feeling grateful for the family he now has. With Even.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Would love to hear your thoughts. Thanks again for reading :))
> 
> Song that inspired the title-few things by jp saxe

**Author's Note:**

> vearthling on tumblr


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